Monday 4 May 2026 - 11:00
When Your Family Ignores Halal and Haram: A Survival Guide

At my family’s weekly gatherings, Islamic boundaries regarding hijab and gender mixing are completely ignored by my relatives, and my parents do not intervene. I am hesitant to speak up for fear of being mocked, but I want to do the right thing. How can I navigate this situation in a way that pleases Allah?

Hawzah News Agency - Question: At my house, Islamic rules (the Sharia) basically aren’t followed. The boundaries of what’s halal (lawful) and haram (unlawful) are totally ignored. It gets especially bad on Fridays when the whole family gets together and my brothers’ wives come over. Everyone shakes hands with the opposite gender, they’re constantly cracking jokes and laughing loudly, and the sisters-in-law just hang out in their casual house clothes without their hijabs, acting like everyone in the room is a mahram (a close relative you don’t need to wear hijab around).

As for my mom and dad, they don’t speak up at all to fix this situation, which, without a doubt, displeases the Lord of the Worlds.

I honestly don’t know if saying something to them will even make a difference, or if they’ll just make fun of me and brush me off. I’m feeling really conflicted. Could you please guide me on what to do to handle this in a way that pleases Allah Almighty?

Answer:

As for your family, they are currently caught up in disobeying Allah. But as for you, here is how you should handle it:

First, you should speak up and advise them against this behavior if you think your words will have any positive impact over them, even if it takes some time to sink in. Don’t worry at all if they mock you. Remember, the Prophets were mocked too, but they still spoke their truth and had a massive, lasting influence later on.

However, if you truly believe that speaking up will have zero benefit, or that they might actually cause you harm in addition to mocking you, then you need to do one of two things for the sake of your family: either sit with them for just a little bit without joining in on any of their unlawful behavior, or simply excuse yourself and leave the gathering.

Dear faithful brother, if you ever feel like a stranger or an outcast among people because of your faith, you should know very well that this means you are close to Allah—and Allah is infinitely better than people!

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Source: "For a better future" by Hussain Ansariyan , Q22

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